A Roller Coaster of Emotions

It has been three months since I came here now and I have experienced and learned so much, yet had many difficult times. I am now involved in many things here and am always meeting new people who have new things they want me to help with. The difficulty has been to find people to help and support me in what I am already doing.

My “typical week” now looks like this: Monday- I work on things for the sponsorship program such as interviewing parents, writing profiles, e-mailing, or brainstorming ideas. In the afternoon, I take some of the young men from my church to the “orphanage” where the boys who were living on the street are now living. It is actually just a house they live in and the older boys take care of the younger ones. They have no programs and so we have been going once a week to share the Bible with them and spend time connecting with them. They are starting to see who Jesus is and the value they have in him. I have seen them looking up to the men and desiring to model them. It is so rewarding to see them start to see their value and have hope for their life despite their circumstances. I frequently meet more and more young boys living on the street and it has been difficult to try and do what is best for them. I try and direct them to other programs that can help them and encourage them to go back to their families and stop begging, but it has not been easy to continue to see them day after day. The problem is usually that their family does not have food or they do not want to follow the rules or do chores, so they come to the street where they can be free and beg for food rather than starve. It is a complex and difficult situation.

On Tuesdays, I volunteer in a deaf classroom at a local school. It has been so great to be able to use my sign language on the other side of the world and to connect with children who are shunned by their families and cut off from communication most of the time. In the afternoons, I have started praying with a young girl from a local high school who has asked me to pray with her about funds for college. She is an orphan and just about to finish high school. It is a miracle she has made it this far, but she dreams of being a journalist, yet has no way of paying for college. We have connected in many ways and I have so much enjoyed being able to walk with her through this time. It has also challenged me in my own prayer life. I am praying that somehow ROCK of Africa and our supporters can help support her. She will be helping me write the profiles for the children and even writing articles about the crisis in Zambia to develop her ability. Tuesdays has also been the day I am supposed to have a girls bible study/encouragement group where young ladies can be free to discuss the issues they are facing. Unfortunately, this group continues to be postponed because the girls are not yet committed. This is my passion and gift which I know is one of the reasons the enemy will not allow it to start. I am praying against this.

Wednesdays and Thursdays, I also work on the sponsorship program as well as try to connect with resources in the community. I also attend a bible study and small group on those days. Recently, I have been learning more about the keyboard from a friend while teaching him how to read music. It has been so great to be able to develop my skills while I am here as well as be a servant to others.

Friday is my day off and I usually try and do something fun and get away from the youth center which is basically my office.

Saturdays, I visit an old people’s home and bring donations as well as just spend time talking with the people there. Saturdays are becoming a day of outreach with the children from the sponsor program as well. This will be a chance for them to develop their gifts and talents and see that they can help others even as they are being helped. I am very excited to start bringing the children to help us and see them become empowered. Saturdays are also the day we have a youth meeting at my church which has been helpful for me to connect with them.

Sundays, of course is the day I go to church and recently I have been teaching my “brother and sister” how to swim. Sometimes I also attend a YWAM meeting bringing youths together from different churches to encourage one another.

I have found all of the things I am doing to be so exciting and have met many other missionaries and youths with the same passion as mine. But, it has also been difficult. I have been learning more about who I am in Christ and the promises he has given us, but have also felt so discouraged from what I am doing at times. I have continued to hear lies that I am not doing anything useful and should not be here anymore, but then I have to be reminded of the truth that comes from the Lord. Right now, I have been constantly praying about whether or not I will be returning here in January and have come up with many reasons for both decisions.

I need your continued prayers for the spiritual attacks against who I am and my purpose for being here as well as prayers for the people and culture here who have also been lied to through traditions about who God is. So many people here have been de-valued and told they are not worth anything because of their circumstances. These lies must be combated and the truth of how Jesus loves them no matter who they are needs to shine through. Helping people to help themselves has also been a challenge as it is so much easier to just give them money or resources, but those things will be used and then what? I have had to learn many of these things the hard way, but it has been a good process.

I appreciate your comments, encouragement, prayer, and financial support and hope that I continue to receive it. My computer is being fixed at the moment, but when I get it back, I also hope to update my pictures on shutterfly so you can see what I have been doing.

Bless you and miss you all dearly,

Erin