Halfway Through Yet Just Beginning

I can’t believe I am halfway through my stay here. I have been here for two and a half months, yet I feel like I am just beginning my ministry here. It has been a very difficult first half, yet I am learning so much. I have felt so inadequate as I don’t have a team to work with or others to teach me, I am a pioneer looking for what it is God brought me for. As you all know, this has been a major challenge as I am meeting so many wonderful people, but trying to find something to do that I am passionate about at the same time. The Lord used a Sunday service to speak to me about how he sees those who think they have nothing to offer based on their own abilities. They are the exact people who he sends and uses in a mighty way. I have to believe that and walk in boldness, but it has not been easy.

I am finally starting to do some things that I am passionate about and feel somewhat productive. I have started interviewing families for sponsorship (using my good ol’ social work skills :) to all my social work buddies) as well as put together profiles for each child. If you are interested in sponsoring, I have some kids ready and those who have already told me, your profiles are coming as soon as they are edited. Anyways, I have also started to volunteer in a class for deaf students at the school nearby my church. Anytime you volunteer in a school though, they want you to teach their class which I am never prepared for. They are teaching me some of the different signs they use and already I love the kids.

The other thing I started this week is visiting the boys I was working with at the place they are staying. I brought about five of the guys from my church with some food to donate and we sang music, gave a message from the Bible (which took forever because we had to translate), and then we discussed it in groups. Already, I saw the boys looking up to the guys that came. They are really wanting a role model and so I was happy to see them look to these guys. One of the boys (Boyd) gave his heart to Jesus which was very exciting. We are excited to continue to visit them and spend time with them. Two of the boys, Davias and Boyd, started school this week which is such an accomplishment! Unfortunately, Nathan ran away to find his mom and since he couldn’t find her, he is now back on the streets. This is very difficult for me to see because I see him all the time in town, but he says he is going back. I hope that is the truth and I think he wants to go back, but I don’t know for sure. The man running the program is very difficult to find so I am really hoping that is the reason he hasn’t gone back yet.

I also have a chance to talk with the girls at a nearby high school about starting a bible study and discussion group. I will be talking to them on Wednesday and encouraging them which is definitely a passion of mine. The matron said she could even get the whole school together to talk to, but I told her I didn’t think I was ready for that and that really I was excited about an intimate group that I can get to know, but of course that is an amazing opportunity. She doesn’t even know me. What if I was giving a message about something crazy? Who knows!

The other thing that I hope to do this week is visit the old people’s home on a continual basis as I know they really don’t have many visitors and they also struggle financially. I would also be bringing some food to them. I am also excited about possibly going to pray with people with AIDS with a man from my church. This is something that stirs my heart immensely so I hope that this is something I can do.

One of the other difficulties I have found in my heart is feeling like there isn’t much need although there is immense need, I just don’t know how to help all the time and it isn’t always things that I am passionate about. Also, because I am in the city, I don’t always see the needs of the villages or even the ghettos of Livingstone and there are so many Christians that sometimes I wonder why I am here when they have people to do the work already, but I realize more and more that sometimes they need a little budge from someone outside. I pray that I my eyes would be more and more opened to the need and that God would show me how my skills and abilities fit those needs.

My biggest need right now is people that will partner with me in prayer for specific things like the sponsorship program, the boys, the deaf school, the girls bible study, the old people’s home, and the people with HIV/AIDS. I also have a chance to go and talk and pray with women in prison. It sounds like a lot, but I still have a lot of time available as these are things that are mostly just once a week. I would like to focus on a few things, but first I need to find my passion. So please, if you are willing to partner with me in prayer, tell me so that I know these ministries are being covered.

On a more personal note, I sang in church this Sunday which was so great, yet it took boldness because I don’t exactly have the greatest voice. I am learning to walk in boldness though so it was good practice. I also finally have at least one girl friend to share more of my heart with which has been such a blessing. I also met many women from the U.S. who are also missionaries here and was able to have lunch with them and be encouraged by them. We also saw many elephants by the river which was such a treat to see.

Well, that is about all of the updates I have. I have so appreciated the support I have had from friends and family back home not only financially and through prayers, but also in the amazing encouragement I have received. It is always helpful to know I am thought about and cared for back home when I am giving so much here and don’t have a cheerleader next to me all the time. I love you all and can’t wait to bring you my next blog to see the things that God is doing through your faithful prayers.

Tizowonana ,
Erin